Monitoring the Self: Alhamdolilah for knowledge…

Can anyone die out of shyness?

I can.

Or I could.

Alhamdolilah for knowledge, otherwise I wouldn’t have been alive.

Alhamdolilah for knowing about that woman who stood up while Umar bin Khattab RA was giving a khutbah, and she corrected him.

Alhamdolilah for knowing that certain things are okay if there’s a purpose behind it.

To me my name is ‘Awrah and any personal detail related to the real me is ‘Awrah…whether those are my good deeds or accomplishments.

And every time I have to share such things (or more) with or talk to unknown people to reach a conclusion pleasing to Allah SWT, it is painful, difficult, agonizing, a clear breach of my limits which I have set to remain ‘pure’.

That’s why men must have gheerah (protective jealousy) over their women ,  of course at a healthy level.

SubhanAllah, how Allah SWT eases your heart with knowledge…and how making His Pleasure as your goal, strengthens a weak heart.

Struggling as I am, I must constantly remind myself that I must have no opinion in matters Allah SWT has already decided for us. Perhaps the inhibition and resistance stem from the blameworthy kind of shyness. Allahu ‘Alam. If it’s really blameworthy, may Allah SWT destroy it. Ameen. It is therefore true that Shaytan comes through the door of doubts and only knowledge can slam it shut on him. May Allah SWT grant me beneficial knowledge to differentiate what is blameworthy or not, with certainty, a.s.a.p. Ameen.


It is not for a believing man or a believing woman, when Allah and His Messenger have decided a matter, that they should [thereafter] have any choice about their affair. And whoever disobeys Allah and His Messenger has certainly strayed into clear error. [Suratul Ahzab, 33:36]

[Tafeer of the Above Verse, you’ll have to scroll down a bit]


Really, isn’t this all Qadr? Then why do I have issues?

Time for seizing the reins of Nafs once again and being thankful.

Time to kick Shaytan out of my mental territory.

It is indeed to Allah SWT we belong and to Him we shall return.


3 comments on “Monitoring the Self: Alhamdolilah for knowledge…

  1. Assalamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullaahi Wa Barakatu,

    These are tricky waters to navigate, insofar as when to share with someone a certain good effort that you’re involved in or something of khayr that you do, but I think it helps to examine if sharing it is truly purposeful or if you can reach the same intended outcome without divulging the good that you do.

    A more agonizing reality than what you’ve posed, as I would find it, is the situation in which others highlight an individual’s good deeds and accomplishments in their very presence. An exceedingly uncomfortable situation. For me, the difference is we have control over what we say and how we say it (if the situation is such that we need to speak of some matter of khayr that we’re involved in). Thus, we may pass over the matter quickly to arrive at the main point that we wished to address. However, we have no control, of course, over what others say and how they express themselves as it relates to them speaking about the khayr that we do.

    Incidentally, I’ve recently been pondering over shyness and when it enters the realm of being blameworthy. May Allaah protect us from this. Aameen.

    Wa Salamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullaahi Wa Barakatu,

    • Also, ukhtil kareema, if you do happen to come across something which mentions the topic of shyness and when it is blameworthy, I would truly appreciate it if you would share this. Besides being briefly mentioned in some lectures in passing, I have not found much on the subject via reading or audio.

      May Allaah bless you, protect you from harm, and increase you in khayr. Aameen.

      Wa Salamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullaahi Wa Barakatu

    • Walaykum asalam warahmatullahi wabarakatuh Ukhti al ‘Aziza,

      First of all a warm welcome to the blog. JazakiAllahu khayran for visiting it, commenting and sharing your thoughts with me. Nothing is more beloved to me than connecting with a sister-in-Islam for the Sake of Allah SWT and I hope to benefit from your thoughts in future as well inshaa’Allah.

      Sister, perhaps what you are alluding to is related to the topic of Sincerity and Ar-Riyaa?

      If we’re talking about the level of modesty required in telling others about our accomplishments/talents for a certain purpose then one could look at the example of Prophet Yusuf AS in Surat Yusuf, aya 55:
      [Yûsuf] said: “Set me over the storehouses of the land; I will indeed guard them with full knowledge” (as a minister of finance in Egypt).

      Maybe tafseer of this specific verse could be found inshaa’Allah and one could learn that in certain instances it is alright to tell someone of their qualities. I remember listening to a tafseer and the speaker said that ‘Ulema have permitted an individual to seek a position of leadership in certain situations.

      I have only heard about blameworthy shyness in the context of seeking knowledge and not enjoining that what is right and forbidding that which is evil. I searched a lot online and did not find anything in English regarding the blameworthy type. There’s lots for the praiseworthy type. It’s a tragedy that such an important topic is not given enough importance in our mainstream Islamic media/lectures/literature.

      However, I did find a paragraph which may be of benefit from the following link: http://www.islamicbulletin.com/newsletters/issue_23/haya.aspx

      After discussing the various types of “beneficial” haya, it is time to discuss the type of haya which is not only against the teachings of our Prophet (saw), but it is also solid proof of the weakness of someone’s Iman. This negative aspect revolves around a person’s shamefulness or shyness of doing something that Allah (SWT) has ordered us to do through the Qur’an or our Prophet’s (saw) Sunnah. This constitutes the shamefulness or embarrassment of doing a lawful act or something that is ordered upon us from Allah (SWT). This means that someone does not follow an obligation of Islam due to the fact of being shy in front of others about it. This is totally forbidden because then one is giving the people of this dunya more respect than the One who Created this whole universe. An example of this type of bad haya is to neglect making one’s prayer in a public place due to being embarrassed in front of others. Another example would be that many sisters feel embarrassed to wear hijab for fear of being laughed at or made fun of. If someone really had haya they would never contradict ANYTHING that Allah (SWT) has ordained upon us even if they found it a test and a trial.

      …and a video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rt9WbM_eOmw&feature=player_embedded. The text: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/11830996/Different_types_of_hayaa.pdf.

      And Allah SWT knows best.

      Many duaas,
      -Umm Sulaym

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