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Advice for Brides

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

  • There will be instances in which you may be right. Just speak to Allah SWT and tell Him that, ‘O Allah I may be right but I’m giving it up for Your Sake.’ And SubhanAllah, you’ll notice everything will work your way even though you didn’t say a single thing.
  • Sometimes a single statement may be perceived by others as an argument even if you didn’t intend it to be like that. So don’t say anything in response.
  • They may be more than 6+ individuals. You’re just one. It’s easier for one person to adjust her routine/lifestyle than 6 individuals to change theirs.
  • Be a giver. If you give now, He SWT will give you in future inshaa’Allah.
  • Always be prepared for tough situations and don’t have high expectations so that when you get even a small thing, you would be more thankful inshaa’Allah.
  • Communicate. Sometimes we use the statement that, ‘he must understand by now’ or ‘He should know what I feel’ but that just makes things difficult. Communicate what you think and feel. Men are open to new ideas and want to work around accommodating. We just make things hard.
  • Seek permission in all affairs. Some people equate it as respect and if not done, as disrespect.
  • Nobody’s perfect. Not them. Not him. Not you.
  • You just have to be patient. You must let things go for the most part.

– Advice from a few sisters regarding marital relationships (may Allah SWT be pleased with them all, ameen.)

~

 رَبَّنَا لَا تُؤَاخِذْنَا إِن نَّسِينَا أَوْ أَخْطَأْنَا ۚ رَبَّنَا وَلَا تَحْمِلْ عَلَيْنَا إِصْرًا كَمَا حَمَلْتَهُ عَلَى الَّذِينَ مِن قَبْلِنَا

رَبَّنَا وَلَا تُحَمِّلْنَا مَا لَا طَاقَةَ لَنَا بِهِ

وَاعْفُ عَنَّا وَاغْفِرْ لَنَا وَارْحَمْنَا ۚ  أَنتَ مَوْلَانَا فَانصُرْنَا عَلَى الْقَوْمِ الْكَافِرِينَ

رَبَّنَا آتِنَا مِن لَّدُنكَ رَحْمَةً وَهَيِّئْ لَنَا مِنْ أَمْرِنَا رَشَدًا

O Allah! Grant us beneficial knowledge only for it is only beneficial knowledge which is followed by accepted good deeds! Ya Jawwad, make our Akhlaq and inner selves beautiful as you have beautified our outer appearances. And as You continue to hide our shortcomings from others Ya Ghafoor, please show them to us gently so that we correct ourselves and not be a means of harm for others or ourselves in this dunia and/or Akhira. Please let not a day come when I become a hypocrite. Please save me from the day in which my speech is more than my action. Please save me from the day when the knowledge is wasted on me. Please make me a slave who always turns to You. Ya Rahmaan, I’m in utter need of Your Mercy… Ya Raheem… Indeed it is You Alone that we ask for help and guidance and indeed it is You Alone, Ya Mujeeb, who has granted me already more than what I could ever ask for!

رَبِّ أَوْزِعْنِي أَنْ أَشْكُرَ نِعْمَتَكَ الَّتِي أَنْعَمْتَ عَلَيَّ وَعَلَىٰ وَالِدَيَّ وَأَنْ أَعْمَلَ صَالِحًا تَرْضَاهُ وَأَصْلِحْ لِي فِي ذُرِّيَّتِي ۖ

إِنِّي تُبْتُ إِلَيْكَ وَإِنِّي مِنَ الْمُسْلِمِينَ

Ameen.

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